(Remember that this is a music account so there are many links to song lyrics below. Please follow the links and study the lyrics.)
Lately I have been thinking about the story of Abraham and how he was called to sacrifice his son, the same son that was a critical part of God’s promise that Abraham would be the father of many peoples. Well, “thinking” is not accurate: more like obsessing about my lack of faith when compared to Abraham. Sure, Abraham was twice my age when he received the command from God, and he had 50 more years to cultivate his faith in God. Or at least this is what I tell myself to make me feel adequate.
Let’s look at the story: “Then God said, ‘Take your son, your only son, whom you love – Isaac – and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on a mountain I will show you.'” (Genesis 22:2). The next verse goes on to describe how Abraham protested to God and then ran away with his family when God wouldn’t change His mind. Just kidding. Read further: “Early the next morning Abraham got up and loaded his donkey. He took with him two of his servants and his son Isaac.” (Genesis 22:3). Abraham did what God said! Not only did he head out the next day, but he also woke up early and left for the trip! That’s faith!
What I am obsessed about isn’t that Abraham woke up the next morning and headed towards the mountain ready to sacrifice his only son. No, in this particular season of my life, what I am obsessed about is the actual journey. The Bible says it took three days to get to the mountain. THREE days! Seventy-two hours, means that Abraham put his worries aside and trusted God for 4,320 minutes! Or, if you’re a constant over-thinker like I am, that’s 259,200 seconds of trusting God! I can barely handle 30 seconds! Abraham surely had faith that God was “working everything for his good” (Symphony).
Surely one of the results of my 50+ years on this earth is that I “can count on the same God who’s never late is working all things out” (Yes I Will). Nope. I stress about the future. Even though the Bible clearly tells us to “not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself” (Matthew 6:34, NIV), I still worry when living through difficult circumstances and making big decisions.
Why? Why do I struggle? I suspect I am not alone, so the question really should be, “Why do we all struggle trusting God?” The answer, of course, is that this is the consequence of the separation between human beings and God that is a result of sin. When they were first placed in the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve walked and talked with God. But one of the consequences of their sin means that we no longer hear God talking to us. There is silence. And it is this silence that feeds our fears and causes us to not trust God.
Back to Abraham and the journey to the mountain. What was he thinking during those 259,200 seconds? One possibility is that he was “Counting his Blessings“:
“It’s like it was yesterday. I was praying for a miracle, scared to have a little hope. And now looking back today, seeing all the things You’ve done, I can’t even add them up. One, two, three, up to infinity, I’d run out of numbers before I could thank you for everything.”
Ten days ago, I came across this song and was struck by the veracity of the message: I was praying for a miracle, but this caused me stress and worry. Instead of worrying about the future, I needed to look back at how God has blessed my life. Look back to move forward. I started a daily practice of journaling the blessings that God has bestowed in my life. Do I still worry? Of course. But focusing on how “God’s mercy never fails me, all my days I’ve been held in Your hands. From the moment that I wake up until I lay my head” (Goodness of God) has dramatically reduced the worry.
One more example from the Bible. Remember the story of Daniel’s friends who were thrown into the fiery furnace but were not turned into crispy-critters and instead emerged alive (Daniel chapter 3)? Three men were thrown into the fire, but read what the king saw: “Then King Nebuchadnezzar leaped to his feet in amazement and asked his advisers, ‘Weren’t there three men that we tied up and threw into the fire?’ They replied, ‘Certainly, Your Majesty.’ He said, ‘Look! I see four men walking around in the fire, unbound and unharmed, and the fourth looks like a son of the gods.'”. Later we learn that the fourth person in the fire was an angel assigned to protect Daniel’s friends. My question: Much like we can’t see God when He is with us during our struggles, did Daniel’s friends think they were alone, or do you think they saw the angel? Did they see Another in the Fire?
I say all of this for two reasons. First, learn from my mistakes and trust God even when He is silent. Especially when He is silent. Second, I am humbled to announce that the next blog article will be written by a dear friend who is in the midst of a journey through a life-altering medical situation. Through all her challenges, she is demonstrating just what it means to trust in God.
You’ll want to come back and read her story. Even if you’re not presently in a health crisis, her testimony will speak to your heart. Subscribe to this blog and you’ll receive an automatic email when that blog post hits the website.
